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00h UTC; SATURDAY, 20 OCTOBER 2012: As you may have heard by now, boys and girls, the Boy Scouts of America, in compliance with an order of the Supreme Court of Oregon, has released a selection of case histories from its legendary "perversion files" of such specimens of Scoutmasters as engaged in Lewd, Immoral or Otherwise Deviant Behaviours dating back at least to the late 1950's under the banner of Building Character and Molding Boys into Men ... which, in some cases, saw the Scouts turn the blind eye to what exactly was going on, especially where their young charges were harmed psychologically and morally, if not so much physically.

Accompanied, in any case, by the following official Appy Polly Loggy from National Headquarters of the Boy Scouts, via the Los Angeles Times, as first broke the current Naughty Scoutmasters Scandal:
The Boy Scouts of Amer­ica believes even a single in­stance of ab­use is un­ac­cept­able, and we regret there have been times when the BSA’s best ef­forts to pro­tect chil­dren were in­suf­fi­cient. For that we are very sorry and ex­tend our deep­est sym­path­ies to vic­tims. We are com­mit­ted to help­ing mem­bers of our Scout­ing fam­ily who have suffered abuse and as­sist them through a vari­ety of means, in­clud­ing coun­sel­ing.

We main­tain our In­eligible Vo­lun­teer Files solely to help our or­gan­iz­a­tion re­move and keep out indi­vidu­als deemed to be un­fit role models. The files help us to pro­tect youth and are one component of our broad­er Youth Pro­tec­tion pro­gram. Scouting has long main­tained mul­tiple barriers to ab­use, of which the IV files are part. The files alone have limit­a­tions and were only meant to serve as a bar­ri­er to keep out un­fit mem­bers as part of a com­pre­hens­ive ef­fort to keep kids safe.

In the more than 30 years since these re­leased files were cre­ated, we have con­tinu­ously enhanced our multi-tiered policies and pro­ced­ures, which now in­clude back­ground checks, compre­hens­ive train­ing pro­grams, and safety policies. We have al­ways co­oper­ated fully with any re­quest from law en­force­ment and today re­quire our mem­bers to re­port even sus­pi­cion of ab­use dir­ectly to their loc­al au­thor­it­ies.

We are com­mit­ted to the on­go­ing en­hance­ment of our pro­gram, in line with evolving best prac­tices for protecting youth.
(As if that weren't enough, the Times has also made available a handy-dandy searchable online databank of Known Perversion File Cases, to see if your community's Scouting programmes have had experience with Naughty Scoutmasters so as to warrant complaint.)

In any event, what lessons do we learn from these revelations, readers?

For one, that there are times when a noble cause such as "building character in youth" can too easily be a ruse for Indecent Sexual Liberties not exactly in the Junior Woodchucks Handbook, which, in the wrong set of ciorcumstances, can be enough for the afflicted to realise (howbeit unwittingly) their unlikely being homosexual or otherwise having "tendencies" towards that end.

For another, that overzealous parents (especially those seeing themselves as "Good Christians" and "REAL AmeriKKKans") who overreact to every breaking story of Indecent Sexual Liberties with Children involving youth organisations or community centres to the extent of insisting that their kids come home straight away from school could unwittingly be seeking to use Indecent Sexual Liberties reeking of incest themselves (as per that infamous story as had Zap Comix #4 banned in several cities when it came out in 1969), to be excused to the extent necessary as Christian Love Made Manifest. Thereby putting paid to the Grand Delusion about the Good Christian being Morally Incapable of Sexual Impropriety, especially of the incestuous sort.

And for still another, that such perversion under the banner of "protecting out children from Sexual Predation" in youth clubs and community centres as is overzealously seen (without evidence, as per usual) to be "promoting homosexuality" (a rather popular canard in the circumstances) is too easily part of "traditional culture and folkways" in such "group areas" of "REAL AmeriKKKans" such as the Scots would call "Spam Glen"--looking well-kept and clean on the outside, but in Reality harbouring the breeding-grounds of poverty, fecundity and ignorance such as the Elmer Gantryites, the "Tea Party" crowd and such excusing their agendae as Serving God and Country towards Reclaiming Our Dear Lovely Nation to His Name and Luscious Glory can easily exploit. A sheer Carnival of Deravity making Peyton Place look like a weekend among the tackier "music shows" down Branson way, one more approriately suited to a hybrid of Harold Robbins/Jacqueline Suzanne and the German Heimatroman genre, especially when done in Mills and Boon/Harlequin stylee.

Sic transit gloria "REAL AmeriKKKa."

Whittard Trading Ltd. T/A Whittard of Chelsea

Before I go, Your Correspondent, as a longtime fan of the Minnesota State Fair, feels compelled to extend sympathies to, and solidarity with, the State Fair of Texas over the loss of the latter's iconic mascot, "Big Tex," to an electrical fire Friday morning after 60 years' presence in Big Tex Circle welcoming its many millions of visitors. Never mind that he was basically papier-mache and cotton denim on a metal pipe frame, by way of the merchants of Kerens, Texas (near Corsicana) who created The World's Largest Santa Claus in 1949 to keep the local Christmas shopping trade there; having lost the novelty within two years, the State Fair Board acquired said Santa Claus and recast him as "Big Tex," its iconic mascot, parked in Big Tex Circle at Fair Park in Dallas, in close proximity to the Cotton Bowl.

Officials with the State Fair of Texas, as closes this weekend, have pledged to rebuild Big Tex "bigger and better than ever" in time for its 2013 edition (27 September-20 October, inclusive; subject to confirmation) ... never mind that Dallas' 277-acre Fair Park can easily be accomodated within the 320-acre Minnesota State Fairgrounds.

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